That was the masthead for my website, in its hey day eight years ago, on which I featured over 500 pictures of myself just as naked as the minute I was born but a hell of a lot bigger. I'd never have described myself as much of an exhibitionist, never really having had the desire to show off my cock and balls to anyone I wasn't about to have sex with (except to my sister when I was around five years old which didn't really go over very well because after I displayed myself and said, "Now show me yours," she replied, "Wait. I have to go ask mommy," at which I screamed but in a muted voice, "No! Never mind!"). That was until I was trolling through the list of adult newsgroups and came upon this one...
I'm sure I did at least a triple take when I read the name of that group. There were actually people who wanted to see fat guys naked? If you're new to the 'net that might surprise you, but at this point I don't think I'd blink an eye if I came upon a new newsgroup or a website dedicated to pictures of amputee, mullet sporting, little people in long leather boots being anally fisted while simultaneously sucking off farm animals and juggling bowling pins. There's something for everybody out here in cyberspace, no matter how perverted, (unfortunately, because I'm not open-minded enough for some specific perversions not to turn my stomach), and when I came upon the realization that there were folks out there who wanted to see big guys with their clothes off, I couldn't get those old Polaroids of myself scanned fast enough and up onto that chubby newsgroup for whomever to see.
To be totally honest it didn't really occur to me that it would be guys who mostly looked at the pictures featured there. I can't tell you what I might have been thinking, but I'm certain that at that point in my sexual evolution I was imagining that women would be seeing my cock and balls. Not that I kidded myself into thinking they might be impressed; it was just "cool" to think that unknown ladies would see these favorite parts of my body which had only been seen by a handful of people through the years in "real life." I probably gave a long sigh when I hit SEND on that first of my many posts to the chubby newsgroup because I often sigh before venturing into something new with a huge first step. It was most likely during that first week after I posted those few pictures that I found in my inbox the letter that would jump start my continuing education in personal sexuality. It was the letter from the guy who told me quite explicitly what he'd like to do to my dick to give me pleasure. It was the letter that first made me consider that I might have a side to myself that wasn't horrifically opposed to homosexual practices after all.
My first yearning to have a digital camera was to take pictures of myself naked to show off online. Though the feedback was sparse, what did come to me was so fucking hot that I was hooked. Hooked on showing the world my body in all its overweight splendor. Dee and the kids would barely be out the door to head out somewhere than my clothes would be coming off and the photo equipment being set up. My website featured thematic photo shoots of me posing with as many varied props and backgrounds as I could dream up. I mean everybody's just waiting to see a fat guy naked with a ten foot, plastic hose coming out of his ass like some kind of alien umbilicus, right? Anybody who might read "Sharing Dee" and think, What the fuck is wrong with you, dude? hasn't even seen an iota of just how wacky I can be. What Dee and I offer of our sexuality online now is tame by comparison to what I was showcasing of my own back then, though my own basically amounted to bad, married sex and a lot of jerking off. Many of my photo sets at the site ended with me gushing the goo. I'd get so turned on making the pictures of myself that the orgasmic finish was only natural to show off.
Well, this sucks... I started writing this early this morning before church and as the day went on I forgot where I was trying to go with this entry other than to make the point that I liked showing off my cock a lot. I think maybe it was going to lead into how, in round about fashion, my love of showing off became Dee's once I got her online and then sort of guided her there, but who knows?
I had this picture ready to put here... It's of me "taking the show on the road" and posing at Dee's family home in the little basement bedroom and on the same bed where she used to fuck her former fiancé.
And I had this shot all lined up of me showing off my dick live and in person to somebody on the old Quick Cam.
But, whatever point I was going to make got lost somewhere between filling out my envelope for church and getting home from a cycle jaunt a little while ago. Maybe tomorrow I'll be inspired sufficiently to finish whatever I might start, but I can't make any promises.
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